The whole hope right now is that he will not snuff me out. i am a smoldering wick, an ember faintly glowing. i am not ablaze, nor do i feel much passion, nor can i muster up much energy to seek his face. life has been windy and hard and i'm tired and listless.
i imagine my life in metaphors and stories to better understand it. i paint a picture book to give my days meaning and my experiences validation. these days have pictures of ripping off dead grape vines from the main branch. or then i see big boulders being thrown out of the way. and sometimes i see myself getting lost in a very big forest.
and i feel all of these things, i feel both lost and relief and pruned. and, i feel like a smoldering wick.
its nice to remember that he will not snuff me out.
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